What your cat wants you to know

If your feline friend could speak your language, here are some things she would probably want you to know.

1) I am your boss. Get used to it. I decide when I want your company. I am not a dog that depends on you to make these decisions in our relationship.

2) I am a fan. I like the food I like and I won’t eat the cheap stuff. I prefer to dump the nasty overnight water on my plate first thing in the morning. If you can’t accommodate this need, don’t yell at me when you see me desperately plunging my head into the toilet for fresh water. Trust me, it’s not something I want to do, but if you don’t take care of me properly, I just don’t have a choice.

3) I like my space. I choose my space. I choose special places in our house to lie in the sun, take an afternoon nap, relax after dinner, etc. Don’t expect me to clean my hair myself. I can’t help but spill out on your gorgeous couch, and personally, I don’t mind if I leave a bit of me in my favorite places.

4) I don’t want to have a new “sister” or “brother” ie: feline relative. If they came to live with you when I did, that’s fine. If you’re trying to improve the quality of my life by giving me a new friend, forget it… I don’t want one. I like being the Queen/King of Our Domain. I don’t want to share my palace with anyone.

5) I like you and I like your children (or most of them). But I think when I want to be bothered with young people. Please don’t push them at me when I’m clearly not in the mood to play, which consequently forces me to tell them that I don’t want to interact with them in the only way I know how: hissing, scratching. , or trying to run away. My actions inevitably lead you to yell at me for showing my feelings. Then we could make life much simpler, if You would avoid this whole scenario from the beginning.

6) I have certain innate needs, such as the need for something to scratch myself. Please make our lives easier by getting something just for this purpose… So I don’t have to resort to using the back of my chair, the rug, the duvet, or the front porch screen (which will definitely make you have to yell at me one more time for something I have a natural desire to do…)

7) Remember that you chose me. You decided to take me home. I did not choose you. I had no choice. However, I treat you with respect and love, so you must also treat me equally…