Building a healthy relationship: how to have a richer, fuller and more satisfying life experience

Building a healthy relationship is such a worthwhile goal to have. Many people simply drift through life and their relationship experience suffers as a consequence.

They can be like two strangers living together, just going through the motions of daily activity, with no real connection to each other and no element of a healthy relationship.

This can mean that a couple gets together and before they know it, they have children. Considering the time and effort required to raise children, this is your priority.

Building a healthy relationship doesn’t even enter the equation. Children grow up and leave home, and couples end up in the empty nest position where they wonder what to do with themselves, living in an unhappy marriage. There are no indications of any traits of a healthy relationship.

Before long, the grandchildren fill the void. This is now your focus and life goes on as usual, and any sign of a healthy relationship is non-existent.

It is easy to identify people in this situation, especially as they get older. They are the ones you see in restaurants or cafes, sitting across from each other, hardly saying a word to each other. They look lost and alone.

Whereas when people aim to build a healthy relationship, their life experience is totally different. It means that this is your priority, everything else fits around it. They look like someone special.

It means that couples make time for each other, not allowing life’s distractions like work and having children to take precedence over this primary concern.

They always communicate, knowing how the other feels and managing their lives. They eat together and organize to have special moments, like going to the movies or the theater, and spending time together. They have a very healthy relationship.

Building a healthy relationship also means that each person has complete respect for the other. There is no room for malice, exasperation, or resentment in such an arrangement.

These latter traits are some of the hallmarks of unhealthy relationships, which eat away at people and can literally lead to health problems.

Not only that, people can feel very bad in general, and many people get caught up in these situations as patterns set in and end up in an unhappy marriage.

It can make your life experience very depressing. From my point of view, life is too short to stay in such circumstances, especially when there are opportunities to build a healthy relationship.

They don’t know, or don’t realize, that they have a choice. You don’t have to stay in these kinds of relationships. Alternatively, they could go to a professional to help them make the necessary changes to have the characteristics of a healthy relationship.

If a couple were to do that, it is crucial that they are clear about their motivation for there to be a successful outcome.

Other aspects of building a healthy relationship include recognizing that each person in the relationship has equal status.

This means that there is no one in charge in the relationship. It is a partnership between two equals. I realize there will be some who will disagree with this point of view based on what beliefs you may have, based on your understanding of scripture, or whatever.

When I shared this opinion with a group of Mormons who asked me to give a talk, I received a standing ovation in response.

When each person has the same status, there is no longer a place for fixed roles in the relationship, which is often a disadvantage for the woman who does not show signs of a healthy relationship.

Now, building a healthy relationship is demonstrated when each person shares household and parental responsibilities.

When men participate in these activities, they are no longer considered to be helping, which implies that it is the man who helps the woman to do what is considered her responsibility.

I’m sure you’ll agree with me, when we talk about building a healthy relationship in this way, it makes a world of difference in the way we all get to experience life.

This is for everyone’s benefit. It’s a real win/win. This leads us all to have a more satisfying, rich and fulfilling life.