Protect your personal care when others tempt you to stray

So, you’ve set your self-care goals and you’re all set. You have even considered the ways you will sabotage yourself, but wait! What about those well-intentioned friends and relatives who:

~ With all good intentions, move the clutter from your house to yours: “this would look great on you” or “I can’t use this, but maybe you can.” (Surroundings and Structures)

~ Seems to dwell on the negative or tell stories about how unfair life is. (Emotions and Thoughts)

~ Invite him to eat “just a bite” or encourage him to stay “just a little longer”. (lifestyle clothing)

~ Walk away from your newfound honesty and assertiveness. (friends, family and colleagues)

They probably don’t mean anything bad, but they can HURT you if they divert you from your self-care goals. So how do you put yourself first and become selfish when others tempt you to stray?

1. Be very clear about yourself. If you are unstable in your commitment, it will show.

2. Ask for what you need. No one can read your mind or know what would make things easier for you. What order do you want to make?

3. Live by example, don’t preach. Just as you weren’t ready to take on healthy goals at other times in your life, your loved ones may not be ready now.

4. Plan ahead. Think about how you are going to say no, prepare alternatives or plan an “escape route”. Do what you have to do to take care of yourself.

5. Be honest. Talk about your goals and what they mean to you. And if you’re going to throw away or give away that mess or leftover birthday cake as soon as you leave, you don’t have to mention it.

6. Choose who to spend time with. You can choose to spend less time with someone who has unhealthy habits. Think about who you’d like to spend more time with: who makes you feel good about yourself, supports your efforts, or models healthy habits and self-care? Focus on spending more time with those people.

As time passes and your daily practices become a habit, you will protect your self-care without even thinking about it. Until then, wait for your life!

(c) Copyright 2005, Genuine Coaching Services.