Sex sells – how much is it really worth?

It is the most desirable physical encounter of human nature. Sex is an act that seeks to give life, fosters affection and reaches the peak of indelible pleasures. A wonderful indulgence between two individuals who are defining their love and eternal commitment to one another. However, at least that’s what it should be. However, sex has become a weapon of mass destruction, used for selfish reasons and ultimately a method of improving social status and earning money.

I recently heard a commercial on the radio for a new product. The interesting thing is that the strategy of this company to promote the innovative, amazing and affordable product was to start the radio voiceover with “DO YOU NEED SEX?” The voiceover then transitions to a product description that has nothing to do with a sexual experience. The radio ad also ended that way. I was absolutely horrified because it was such a ridiculous and childish attempt to promote a useful product, in such a disgusting way. If you have to use sex to get the attention of others, then you need to reconsider the value of what you have to offer. The fact that he uses a manipulative approach that could backfire and become a complete distraction from his initial goal is embarrassing.

There is a great deal of sexual exploitation within entertainment and it becomes sad when the commercial industry trades its integrity and professionalism for a few extra clients. What does all this really suggest? That as long as we have sex on our minds we can rise in business and make clearer decisions regarding our personal and corporate purchases?

Our American society has become so enthralled with sex, money, and the image of things that we have neglected to seek and appreciate the essence of life. We have eradicated the need for virtues and have adopted a depraved mentality. We have replaced a lifestyle of values, respect for others, and self-discipline with social acceptance and style.

Everything created has something good, but there comes a point when corruption tries to invade what was destined for good. I am against that corruption. For example, let’s consider this from “Myspace.” I am able to appreciate the positive uses of networking and correspondence between long-distance friends. And maybe for some, there is an opportunity for love and fellowship. It is a fun and unique resource. However, I find it somewhat disconcerting when both men and women express their desire for a faithful and quality partner, but show the opposite within their identity. The average woman says, “I’m looking for a man who is financially stable, who is God fearing, respectful, and wants more from me than just sex.” Granted, that’s a fair request, but this same woman has her myspace profile full of semi-nude photos of herself in sexual poses. Based on how she represents herself, what is the first thing this man is going to think of? Sex, of course.

She is asking a man to take care of her in a way that she doesn’t even consider herself.
If all you want is sex, then that’s what you advertise, but it’s hard to attract a certain type of person if that’s not the quality personality you represent. How you want someone else to see you is how you should see yourself.

Ladies, if the only way you can get a man’s attention is by proposing your body for viewing or physical pleasures, then you really had nothing to offer in the first place that would sustain the relationship and make him want to stay. The same goes for the knights. When you get to a place in life and are ready to settle down, the type of woman you want to be your wife is not someone who has been sexually exposed to multiple men. So why would you maintain a lifestyle with multiple sexual partners and then when you’re looking for Mrs. True, she must be a classy virgin. What you distribute in life will come back to you. Now, I’m not saying you can’t embrace your sexuality and feel sexy; however, there is a fine line between selling sex and being sexy. Selling sex is derogatory and being sexy is having confidence in your identity as a man or woman and recognizing it in others.

Although I think it’s a beautiful thing, our society is abusing the purpose of sex to sell records, boost TV ratings, draw crowds at the box office, and climb the corporate ladder. Everything has a cause and effect, so ask yourself, “Why do I do it? What do I gain or lose?” As our world continues to sell us on sex, our generations are buying more sexual abuse, teen (and younger) pregnancies, and sexually transmitted diseases. Research shows that African Americans make up 13 percent of the US population, but account for more than 50 percent of all new HIV cases. The AIDS epidemic is no longer just in Africa, it is starring us right in the face. But we keep promoting it, saying, “Have sex with as many people as possible, but just use protection and you’ll be fine.”

Sure go buy a box of condoms, but who is protecting the essence of your spirit, preserving the stability of your soul, and guarding the tenderness of your heart.

This is not a religious issue, it is a life issue. For those of us who have experienced the consequences of this, we understand that sex goes beyond intercourse. It is, more importantly, a spiritual and emotional connection, in which you can find yourself or lose yourself. Finding yourself means that you have discovered the individual with whom you become one and share your life together. Getting lost is when you give yourself to this person, to that person and to whoever wants a turn. But when all is said and done, what will be left of your self-esteem when these partners have come and gone? This too, especially for women, can make it harder to let go.

It’s obvious that sex really does sell, and maybe you read this column just because you saw the word “sex” in the headline, but in the long run, was it really worth it? Did you get anything to improve your perception and actions? Where are the ladies and gentlemen who are not afraid to uphold the standards and do not allow society, conventional entertainment and money to demean the character of who they are and limit the potential for greater happiness in mind, body and spirit? It’s time to get real about it. Sometimes our immediate desires can be the bane of a lifetime of divine health, joy, and spiritual well-being.

By: Shavon Reed

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