Tony Soprano style dog training

“Revenge is like serving cold cuts”

-Tony Soprano

That saying was the first thought that came to my mind when I hung up the phone.

I’m a huge Soprano fan. I thought the show was very funny and it made me roll on the floor laughing at times. Especially when they messed up common quotes like “Revenge is a dish best served cold.”

Anyway, let me explain why I was thinking of the classic Tony Soprano misquote.

I had just spent about 20 minutes trying to explain the dog’s behavior to a very angry person. This person was upset with his dog because every time he leaves his house his dog destroys something.

Today he was especially angry because his dog ate the TV remote. Add to this that his dog has already destroyed his shoes, the corners of his coffee table, and the cushions on his couch.

And guess what?

The behavior was getting worse.

He was convinced that his dog was mad at him and he was doing it out of spite. I asked him how he handled the situation when he came home to find his dog had chewed on something.

He was honest with me and told me that he yelled at him and sometimes hit his dog.

It was at this point that I tried to explain that dogs have emotions. I don’t care what anyone tells you, dogs are capable of experiencing fear, happiness, anger, etc. I am a firm believer that dogs have emotions BUT I also believe that dogs operate on a much more basic level than we do.

When you look up the definition of spite, it says:

1. A malicious, usually petty, desire to harm, annoy, frustrate, or humiliate another person; bitter ill will; malice.

2. A particular case of such an attitude or action; Crush.

3. To annoy or frustrate, out of spite.

Spite, revenge, gratitude, etc. They are much more complex emotions. Dogs really live in the moment.

Are dogs capable of revenge, spite, etc.? None of us really know. But from my observations, we often project our feelings and emotions onto our dogs. It reminds me of another favorite J. Allen Boone quote:

“There are opinions about dogs and there are facts about dogs. We have all the opinions and the dogs have all the facts.”

When you leave your house, your dog doesn’t sit there and think about how mad they are that you left. What happens is that your dog is an extremely social animal that is programmed to be with other dogs or humans. Because they are connected in this way, they get stressed when left alone. To relieve stress, they chew, usually something with your scent on it.

The dog’s owner comes home to find that something has been bitten. It’s not much fun to come home from a hard day and find your favorite pair of shoes destroyed. Due to anger and frustration, the dog is punished.

But here’s the rub, and it’s really ironic.

Your dog does not associate the punishment with biting your shoes, your dog associates the punishment with your coming home. If this happens a lot, your dog will learn that coming home is associated with punishment.

In the same way, your dog can learn when it’s time to eat if you feed him at the same time every day. In the same way that your dog can tell when your spouse is coming home, if he comes home at the same time every day.

Your dog may learn that when he gets home he is going to be grounded, which stresses him out. Now destructive behavior can become a real problem because…

Dogs relieve stress by…

You guessed it.

chewing.

See how the whole problem can get out of hand.

Aim…

I couldn’t make the guy I was talking to believe me. He wanted to think that her dog was getting revenge. Too bad, I really feel bad for the dog. Unfortunately, some people find it difficult to think like a dog, which is the real secret to dealing with behavior problems.

Don’t think like a human; Learn to think like a dog.

I might be wrong. Maybe our dogs walk thinking:

“How can I get back at him for leaving me here? What I can do? make him angry I’ll show you by leaving me here.

The great trainer Jean Donaldson puts it perfectly when she said:

“Expect your dog to act like a dog. Don’t take it personally when he displays typical canine behavior. He’s not being ‘mean’, he’s just being a dog.”